Looking for a good laugh at America’s Team? We’ve rounded up the funniest Dallas Cowboys jokes that’ll have even the most die-hard fans chuckling (while secretly crying inside). Whether you’re a rival fan or just enjoy some good-natured NFL humor, these jokes are perfect for your next game day gathering.
We all know the Cowboys have a complicated relationship with success—even though their “America’s Team” nickname and billion-dollar stadium. Their spectacular playoff disappointments and sometimes questionable coaching decisions have created the perfect storm for comedy gold. From Tony Romo’s fumbles to Jerry Jones’ ownership style, nothing’s off-limits in our collection of Cowboys-themed humor.
10 Dallas Cowboys Jokes That’ll Have Football Fans Rolling
- Why don’t the Dallas Cowboys ever drink tea? Because they can’t find the Super Bowl! This classic joke pokes fun at the Cowboys’ long championship drought since 1995, making it a favorite among rival fans.
- What’s the difference between a dollar bill and the Dallas Cowboys? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill! Football fans love this one because it highlights the team’s notorious late-game collapses.
- How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just stand around and talk about how good the old one was! This joke references how Cowboys fans and management often live in the past glory days.
- What do the Dallas Cowboys and possums have in common? Both play dead at home and get killed on the road! Away game struggles have been a recurring theme for the Cowboys in recent seasons.
- Did you hear about the Cowboys fan with the Super Bowl ring? Neither have we! The newer generation of Cowboys fans have never experienced a championship, giving rival fans plenty of ammunition.
- What’s the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby? The baby will stop crying eventually! This joke targets the reputation of Cowboys fans for being overly emotional about their team’s performance.
- How do you keep a Cowboys fan from beating you up? Put a football playoffs picture on your shirt! The playoff disappointments make for easy comedic material among NFL fans.
- What do you call 53 millionaires sitting around watching the Super Bowl? The Dallas Cowboys! This joke hits at the team’s high payroll even though their lack of championship appearances.
- Why was Jerry Jones spotted studying at the library? Someone told him the Cowboys needed better draft picks! The owner’s controversial personnel decisions have made him a frequent target for jokes.
- What’s the difference between a Cowboys fan and a mosquito? One is annoying and draws blood, and the other is an insect! The perceived arrogance of some Cowboys fans makes this comparison particularly amusing for rival fan bases.
When America’s Team Becomes America’s Meme
The Dallas Cowboys’ famous “America’s Team” nickname has become a double-edged sword, creating the perfect foundation for both self-deprecating humor and rival fan mockery. This title, combined with Texas-sized pride and a championship drought, has transformed the Cowboys into one of the NFL’s most meme-worthy franchises.
The “Super Bowl Drought” Collection
Cowboys fans have endured a 28-year championship absence that’s become comedic gold for joke creators everywhere. Memes frequently compare spotting the Cowboys in a Super Bowl to “seeing Bigfoot” – both equally rare and questionable occurrences. The team’s playoff performances inspire witty one-liners such as comparing them to a dollar bill because they’re “folded every Sunday” during important games. Creative fans have even developed fictional horror movie titles like The Playoff Disappearance to capture the team’s postseason struggles. Another popular joke format asks “How many Cowboys fans does it take to change a lightbulb?” with the punchline “None, they’re still waiting for the replay” – highlighting their tendency to cling to past glories rather than accept current realities.
Jerry Jones’ Ownership Zingers
Jerry Jones’ highly visible ownership style provides endless material for comedic content creators. His infamous microphone failures during press conferences have spawned viral memes symbolizing the gap between the team’s preseason “hype” and regular season “reality.” Jones’ hands-on management approach inspires jokes like “Why did Jerry Jones hire a personal trainer? To learn how to carry a lead” – referencing the team’s reputation for late-game collapses. His constant media presence generates quips about “Jerry checking his watch during losses,” suggesting his impatience with the team’s performance even though his role in shaping it. NFL Memes’ popular “Are NFL memes roasting the Cowboys? Join the club!” posts regularly go viral, showing how the Cowboys’ struggles under Jones have become a unifying force for fans across rival teams. Jones’ frequent coaching changes and declarations of “a new drive” for the organization provide reliable punchlines in the football comedy industry.
The Star-Studded Rivalry Roasts
Nothing fuels comedy quite like divisional rivalries in the NFL. The Cowboys’ NFC East opponents have developed entire arsenals of jokes targeted at America’s Team, with each franchise bringing its own flavor to the roasting.
Eagles Fan Favorites
Philadelphia Eagles fans have mastered the art of mocking their Dallas rivals with brutal efficiency. “What’s the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a pinball machine? You can score on a pinball machine” represents a classic Eagles burn highlighting the Cowboys’ defensive weaknesses. Eagles supporters frequently comment on the perceived intelligence of Cowboys fans with jokes like “Why are Dallas Cowboys jokes getting dumber? Because Cowboys fans started making them.” These barbs reflect the intense rivalry between these two franchises, with Philadelphia fans particularly enjoying moments when they can contrast their competitive spirit against Dallas’s playoff disappointments.
Giants’ Go-To Gags
New York Giants fans focus their comedic talents on Dallas’s misfortunes, especially in head-to-head matchups. Their arsenal includes gems like “Why do ducks fly over Cowboys Stadium upside down? There’s nothing worth crapping on,” a direct shot at the team’s home-field struggles even though their impressive stadium. Giants supporters don’t pull punches with jokes such as “What does Brokeback Mountain and the NFL have in common? The Cowboys both suck,” delivering blunt criticism of Dallas’s performance. These jokes serve as verbal revenge for Giants fans, particularly after disappointing divisional games against their Texas rivals.
Washington’s Wisecracks
Washington Commanders fans create jokes that target both the Cowboys’ on-field performance and ownership quirks. Their humor often features Jerry Jones, as evidenced by “What’s the difference between John Wayne Bobbitt and Jerry Jones? Jones cut off his own Johnson,” referencing the team’s quarterback history. Washington supporters also attack Dallas’s offensive struggles with jokes like “What’s the difference between the Cowboys and the Taliban? The Taliban has a running game.” These wisecracks reflect the longstanding division rivalry and Washington fans’ eagerness to highlight any Dallas shortcoming, whether related to coaching decisions, player performance, or front office management.
The “Almost Had It” Playoff Punch Lines
Dallas Cowboys playoff performances have become legendary for all the wrong reasons, creating a goldmine of jokes focused on their notorious ability to fall short when victory seems within reach. Cowboys fans know the pain all too well – that moment when hope transforms into familiar disappointment during crucial playoff games.
Playoff futility jokes remain among the most popular, such as: “Why did the Cowboys team make an app? To help find the playoffs.” This perfectly captures the team’s struggle to advance in the postseason even though their regular-season success.
Stadium humor often targets the impressive Cowboys facility and its relationship to disappointing outcomes. As one joke asks: “Why does the Cowboys’ stadium have so many exits? To let down all the fans at once.” The massive venue, ironically, provides ample space for collective disappointment.
Historical references frequently appear in Cowboys jokes, highlighting their distant championship success. One example asks: “Why did the Cowboys coach buy a telescope? To look at past victories?” This cleverly points to the team’s tendency to reminisce about their 1990s glory days rather than creating new championship memories.
Trophy drought humor shows up in jokes like: “Why don’t the Dallas Cowboys drink tea? Because the last time they had a cup, they lost the cup.” This references their inability to secure championship trophies even though coming close on several occasions.
Weather-related comedy also targets their playoff performance struggles: “Where do you go in Dallas in case of a tornado? Cowboys Stadium – they never get a touchdown there.” Stadium touchdown droughts during crucial games have become a recurring theme in Cowboys folklore.
The 2006 Wild Card game against the Seattle Seahawks stands as a classic example of the Cowboys’ playoff choking tendency. Seattle managed to overcome a 20-13 deficit in the fourth quarter to win, adding another chapter to Dallas’s “almost had it” playoff narrative.
Hall of Fame talent hasn’t insulated the Cowboys from playoff disappointments. Since 1996, even though fielding teams with Hall of Fame-caliber players, Dallas has repeatedly fallen short in the postseason, particularly in Wild Card rounds where they’ve been outperformed when it matters most.
Tony Romo Commentary Jokes
Tony Romo’s transition from Cowboys quarterback to broadcaster has created an entirely new category of Dallas Cowboys humor. His enthusiastic commentary style in the booth has become almost as famous as his playing career, giving fans plenty to chuckle about during NFL broadcasts.
Football viewers often joke about Romo’s uncanny ability to predict plays before they happen, only to “jinx” them moments later. Many fans create memes highlighting his excited “Here it comes!” predictions that sometimes fall hilariously flat when teams do the opposite of what he anticipates.
CBS executives reportedly love when Romo gets overly animated during crucial game moments, leading to jokes about how he shows more excitement in the commentary booth than most current Cowboys do on the field. His passionate “Ohhhhh Jim!” exclamations to broadcast partner Jim Nantz have spawned countless social media jokes and impression videos.
Fantasy football players regularly create memes about Romo “cursing” their players by predicting big plays that never materialize. The commentary booth has given Romo a second career where fans joke he’s finally able to complete more successful passes than he did in his playing days.
NFL viewers frequently point out that Romo seems to predict Cowboys games with less accuracy than other matchups, sparking jokes about his continued loyalty affecting his broadcasting objectivity. His optimistic tone when discussing Dallas’s chances often becomes comedic material after yet another Cowboys disappointment.
Social media lights up whenever Romo gets particularly animated during Cowboys primetime games, with jokes suggesting he might leap from the booth to suit up if Dallas falls behind. The contrast between his enthusiastic commentary and the Cowboys’ typically underwhelming performances creates perfect material for online humor.
Draft Day Disasters That Became Comedy Gold
The Dallas Cowboys’ draft history has provided endless material for comedians and rival fans alike. Even though their reputation as “America’s Team,” their draft day blunders have left fans shaking their heads and opponents laughing all the way to the playoffs. We’ve compiled some of the most notorious Cowboys draft mistakes that have transformed from front office nightmares into comedy gold.
The Taco That Couldn’t Satisfy Hunger for Defense
In 2017, the Cowboys selected defensive end Taco Charlton with the 28th overall pick, passing on T.J. Watt who went 30th to the Steelers. Watt has since become a three-time All-Pro and won the 2021 NFL Defensive Player of the Year award, while Charlton lasted just two unproductive seasons in Dallas. Fans now joke that “Taco Tuesday” in Dallas refers to the weekly reminder of this draft disaster, with many quipping that the only thing “Taco” successfully tackled was the Cowboys’ defensive potential.
The Randy Moss Miss That Still Haunts Jerry
Perhaps no draft decision haunts Cowboys fans more than passing on Randy Moss in 1998. Jerry Jones skipped on the future Hall of Famer even though desperately needing receiver help, leading to decades of “what if” scenarios. Moss went on to become one of the greatest receivers in NFL history, while Cowboys fans were left with endless jokes about how the only “Moss” the Cowboys could catch was growing on the bench. This mistake has spawned countless memes comparing Jones’ talent evaluation skills to a blindfolded dart thrower.
The Hill They Chose to Die On
The 2019 selection of defensive tackle Trysten Hill just six picks before DK Metcalf exemplifies the Cowboys’ knack for missing on generational talent. While Metcalf developed into one of the league’s most physically dominant receivers, Hill struggled to make an impact in Dallas. NFL comedians frequently note that the only thing Hill consistently tackled was the Cowboys’ draft grade, with fans joking that “Trysten Hill” sounds like the name of a place where draft hopes go to die.
Carpenter Built Nothing but Disappointment
Bobby Carpenter’s selection over Tamba Hali in 2006 represents another classic Cowboys draft gaffe. Hali went on to become a six-time Pro Bowler with the Chiefs, while Carpenter earned the unfortunate nickname “Barbie Carpenter” for his soft play. Cowboys fans still use “pulling a Carpenter” as shorthand for making a terrible decision when a much better option was clearly available. The irony of drafting a “Carpenter” who couldn’t build a solid career continues to provide material for rival fans’ roasts.
The Dixon Disaster
Tony Dixon over Adrian Wilson in 2001 might not be as well-known as other Cowboys draft mistakes, but it’s equally painful. Wilson developed into a five-time Pro Bowl safety, while Dixon faded into obscurity after a brief stint in Dallas. Draft experts now use this selection as a textbook example of overthinking the process, with jokes suggesting that the Cowboys’ draft room must have accidentally grabbed their “do not draft” list instead of their target board.
Second-Round Syndrome
Since 2019, the Cowboys’ second-round picks have been largely disappointing, with Trevon Diggs standing as the lone success (even though recent injury struggles). This consistent inability to capitalize on premium draft positions has become a running gag among NFL fans. Fantasy football players often joke that drafting a Cowboys second-rounder to their team is like voluntarily starting a game down 10 points – technically possible to overcome, but why would you do that to yourself?
These draft day disasters have cemented the Cowboys’ reputation for snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, even before their picks take a single NFL snap. While painful for die-hard fans, these blunders have provided endless entertainment for everyone else, proving that in the NFL, one team’s draft disaster truly is another fan base’s comedy gold.
Cowboys Stadium Jabs
AT&T Stadium, or “Jerry Industry” as it’s often called, provides endless material for jokes about the Dallas Cowboys. The massive $1.2 billion facility, while architecturally impressive, has become a punchline in itself due to the team’s lackluster performance within its walls.
“Why did the Cowboys put wheels on their stadium? To roll with the losses.”
“Where do you go in Dallas during a tornado? Cowboys Stadium—they never get a touchdown there.”
Stadium-related humor frequently targets the irony of having such a magnificent venue host such disappointing performances. The stadium’s design flaws have even become fodder for jokes, particularly after a 2024 loss to the Eagles when sun glare reportedly affected gameplay.
The Jumbotron Jokes
The massive jumbotron hanging in AT&T Stadium serves as a perfect metaphor for the Cowboys’ priorities—flashy displays over substance. Media personalities like Tony Reali have trolled the Cowboys by joking about the stadium’s lights blinding players during crucial game moments. Fans often quip that the jumbotron is so large because it’s the only way Cowboys fans can see what winning looks like these days.
Stadium technology jokes typically imply that the impressive screen merely distracts from disappointing on-field performance. Cowboys opponents frequently joke that the team spends more time watching replays on the enormous screen than making actual plays worth replaying. The jumbotron’s enormous size has inspired wisecracks about it being visible from space—unlike the Cowboys’ playoff victories.
Premium Pricing Punchlines
The exorbitant cost of attending Cowboys games provides rich material for jokes about the poor return on investment fans receive. Season ticket holders often become the butt of jokes about paying premium prices for mediocre results.
“Why do Cowboys fans bring calculators? To keep track of losses.”
“Why are tickets so expensive? To pay for all the ‘almost’ trophies.”
Pricing humor emphasizes the disconnect between the Cowboys’ luxury experience and their championship drought. Rival fans regularly mock Dallas supporters for paying top dollar to witness playoff disappointments. The stadium’s premium seating, concessions, and parking have all inspired jokes about fans needing second mortgages just to watch their team underperform in person.
Fan-centric humor frequently highlights the cost versus disappointment ratio, with many jokes suggesting that Cowboys fans pay champagne prices for beer league results. The VIP experience at AT&T Stadium has become synonymous with watching expensive failures unfold in comfort, making it a prime target for comedic jabs from both rival fans and frustrated Cowboys supporters alike.
The “Next Year Is Our Year” Annual Comedy Special
The “Next Year Is Our Year” mantra has become the unofficial slogan of the Dallas Cowboys fanbase, serving as both a coping mechanism and a comedic cornerstone of their identity. This eternally optimistic phrase encapsulates the blend of hopefulness and resignation that characterizes Cowboys fandom during their 28-year championship drought. Many fans recite this phrase with increasing desperation each season, creating an annual tradition as predictable as playoff disappointments.
Cowboys supporters have transformed this perpetual optimism into self-deprecating humor that helps them process recurring setbacks. “How many Cowboys fans does it take to change a lightbulb? None – they just talk about how good the old one was and expect the new one to change itself” perfectly captures this mentality. The yearly ritual begins immediately after elimination, when fans start insisting that next season will finally bring championship glory.
Rival fans eagerly await this declaration, knowing it presents prime material for mockery. Each January brings a fresh wave of social media posts joking about the Cowboys’ unfulfilled potential, with memes comparing their annual optimism to other unlikely events. “The Cowboys saying ‘next year is our year’ is like me saying ‘I’ll start my diet tomorrow’ – we all know neither is happening,” exemplifies how this phrase has transcended football to become a cultural reference point for unrealized promises.
Statistical analysis of the Cowboys’ performance makes this annual optimism particularly comical. Since their last Super Bowl victory in 1996, Dallas has managed just four divisional round appearances even though entering multiple seasons as championship favorites. Their playoff record during this period stands as a punchline in itself, with the team’s consistently strong regular seasons giving way to postseason collapses that reinforce the joke.
NFL commentators have joined in on the fun, with even former Cowboys like Tony Romo occasionally acknowledging the irony of the team’s perpetual “next year” mindset. The phrase has become so synonymous with Cowboys culture that fans sometimes embrace it preemptively, beating critics to the punchline by acknowledging the team’s cycle of hope and disappointment before others can point it out.
Social media platforms amplify this comedic tradition each year, with the hashtag #NextYearIsOurYear trending after every season-ending loss. Memes comparing Cowboys fans to characters from groundhog day, eternally stuck in the same loop of optimism and disappointment, circulate widely during the offseason. The tradition has become so established that even casual NFL followers recognize it as part of the league’s cultural industry.
Coaching Carousel Comedic Relief
The Dallas Cowboys’ revolving door of head coaches has become a comedic goldmine for NFL fans. Over the years, the team’s coaching changes have provided endless material for jokes that highlight the disconnect between expectations and reality.
Why did the Cowboys coach cross the road? To get away from Jerry Jones before being fired! This common joke format plays on the team’s tendency to cycle through coaches even though their “America’s Team” status. Many fans quip that Cowboys coaches need personal trainers just to learn how to “carry a lead” through an entire season.
Career longevity jokes frequently target the short shelf life of Dallas coaches. “What’s the difference between a Cowboys coach and a dollar bill? You can get four quarters out of a dollar bill!” These punchlines emphasize the team’s historical struggles with finishing strong under various leadership.
Playoff preparation humor takes aim at coaches’ postseason failures. One popular joke suggests Cowboys coaches attend art school during the offseason to improve their “finishing touches” when games matter most. These comedic jabs directly reference the team’s inability to translate regular season success into playoff victories since 1996.
Sideline behavior gags often feature coaches looking confused during crucial moments. “How many Cowboys coaches does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just wait for the replay to change it!” This format mockingly connects coaching indecision to the team’s on-field performance issues.
Jerry Jones interference jokes highlight the owner’s notorious hands-on approach. Fans joke that Cowboys coaches receive more texts from Jerry during games than they do from their families all week. This humor reflects the unique power ever-changing that affects every coach who takes the Dallas job.
The coaching carousel comedy particularly resonates with long-suffering fans who’ve witnessed multiple leadership changes without a corresponding championship. These jokes serve as both entertainment and a coping mechanism for the faithful who continue hoping each new coach will finally break the cycle of playoff disappointment.
The Ultimate Cowboys Fan Comebacks
Whether you’re a die-hard Cowboys supporter or just enjoy NFL humor we hope these jokes have brightened your day. The best part about Cowboys comedy? It brings fans together through shared experiences of hope mixed with heartbreak.
Next time someone roasts your beloved Dallas Cowboys remember laughter is the best defense. After all being a Cowboys fan isn’t just about championships—it’s about unwavering loyalty through decades of “almost” moments.
So wear your star with pride and keep that sense of humor handy. Because while trophies might gather dust our ability to laugh at ourselves never gets old. And who knows? Maybe next year really IS our year!
Frequently Asked Questions
Why are Dallas Cowboys called “America’s Team”?
The Dallas Cowboys earned the nickname “America’s Team” in 1978 when NFL Films narrator John Facenda used it in a highlight film. The name stuck because of their nationwide popularity, frequent television appearances, and marketing success. Despite not winning a Super Bowl since 1995, they remain one of the most valuable sports franchises globally and maintain a massive fanbase across the country.
How long has it been since the Cowboys won a Super Bowl?
The Dallas Cowboys haven’t won a Super Bowl since the 1995 season (Super Bowl XXX), when they defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers 27-17. This 28-year championship drought has become a major source of jokes and frustration for fans, especially given the team’s continued popularity and “America’s Team” moniker.
What is the “Next Year Is Our Year” Cowboys joke about?
“Next Year Is Our Year” has become the unofficial slogan of Cowboys fans during their 28-year championship drought. It represents the annual cycle of preseason optimism followed by inevitable disappointment. The phrase has evolved into both a self-deprecating coping mechanism for Cowboys fans and a punchline for rival fanbases who mock the team’s perpetual state of unfulfilled expectations.
Why is Jerry Jones criticized so often in Cowboys jokes?
Jerry Jones, the Cowboys’ owner since 1989, is frequently the butt of jokes due to his hands-on management style, controversial personnel decisions, and constant media presence. Despite building a business empire worth billions, his football decisions haven’t translated to championship success in nearly three decades. His dual role as owner and general manager makes him an easy target for criticism and humor.
What was the Tony Romo botched field goal incident?
During the 2006 NFC Wild Card game against the Seattle Seahawks, quarterback Tony Romo (serving as the holder) fumbled the snap on what would have been a game-winning 19-yard field goal. This error, known as “the bobble,” resulted in a 21-20 loss and has become emblematic of the Cowboys’ playoff misfortunes. It remains one of the most memorable playoff collapses in NFL history.
Why do people joke about Cowboys Stadium (AT&T Stadium)?
AT&T Stadium, nicknamed “Jerry World,” is mocked because its $1.2 billion opulence and state-of-the-art features contrast sharply with the team’s lack of championship success. Jokes target the massive jumbotron, expensive ticket prices, and the irony of building such an impressive venue for a team that hasn’t reached a conference championship game since 1995. The stadium has become a symbol of style over substance.
What notable draft mistakes have the Cowboys made?
The Cowboys’ most notorious draft blunders include selecting Taco Charlton over T.J. Watt in 2017, passing on Randy Moss in 1998, choosing Trysten Hill instead of DK Metcalf in 2019, and picking Bobby Carpenter over Tamba Hali in 2006. These decisions have provided endless material for jokes, highlighting the team’s tendency to miss out on generational talent while making questionable selections.
Why is the Cowboys-Eagles rivalry so intense?
The Cowboys-Eagles rivalry is among the NFL’s most heated due to their shared NFC East division, proximity, contrasting team cultures, and passionate fanbases. The rivalry intensified during the 1980s and has featured memorable trash-talking, dramatic games, and fierce competition. Eagles fans particularly enjoy mocking the Cowboys’ championship drought, while Cowboys fans reference their historical advantage in Super Bowl victories.
